Witnessing Grief

Inviting Trauma and Loss to Our Coaching Conversations,
An Enneagram Perspective

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Witnessing Grief: Inviting Trauma and Loss to Our Coaching Conversations
by Holly Margl

Witnessing Grief is a beacon for coaches and therapeutic professionals, guiding them to deeply connect with clients navigating grief, trauma, and loss. Dive into conscious presence, self-awareness, and deep reflection, illuminated through the Enneagram lens. This guide uncovers coach biases, empowering you to become a genuine anchor in your client's healing journey. Be more than just a listener – be a steadfast witness.

BookFest Awards Fall 2023

A Primer for Witnessing Grief 

Witnessing Grief is organized into three parts:

Part I: Meeting Grief defines and examines grief, how we navigate its path in our lives, and how we may begin to understand how to navigate that path with our clients. 

Part II: Using the Enneagram gives a broad overview of the Enneagram and its nine dominant biases. Additionally, these chapters look at how we can use the wisdom of the Enneagram to look at ourselves and the lens through which we view the world. This introspection will allow us to serve our clients more deeply and create a safe space as they navigate the complex waters of loss, trauma, and grief. 

Part III: Putting It in Action The grief process chapters are application-oriented. They take everything we’ve learned in Parts I and II and allow the reader to use that information to understand better how to navigate real-life scenarios and coaching situations involving grief, trauma, and loss.

Application Oriented 

Witnessing Grief contains specific elements to further the reader’s experience and understanding of the grief psychology concepts presented. These elements provide a background for the reader rather than simply “telling” the reader, “this is what you should do in this situation.” Everything comes back to conscious presence in the coaching conversation, and everything about this book supports self-exploration and presence for the reader. Grief coaching techniques can be learned and utilized uniquely in each situation.

These grief process elements include:

● Inspirational quotes to further support and enhance the content in each chapter and as an expanded understanding of grief’s impact on our lives.

● “Consider This” and “Pause and Reflect” passages within the chapter narratives that require inquiry, active reflection, or contemplation with great intention. ● Closing Inquiries at the end of each chapter. These questions help you think outside the box you’ve built around yourself. They will challenge your status quo and expand your awareness of the chapter’s topic. ● The Epilogue: You Can Do More Than Imagine addresses common fears and pitfalls all of us fall into at one time or another as we navigate complex and distressing conversations of trauma, loss, and grief.

Genuine Stories and Narratives 

The raw and heart-wrenching stories of trauma and loss woven into this book are real accounts; however, for anonymity and confidentiality, modifications may exist. 

Chapter 9 includes several coach/client scenarios to help further the reader’s understanding and application of the concepts presented in Parts I and II. 

In each example, you’ll find a presenting topic stated in the client’s words. Next, you’ll find a typical grief process coach response followed by a potential revision to that response that would be more helpful to the client in their distress.

Finally, this book on grief is for coaches; consequently, coaching standards are essential for coaching proficiency. Therefore, each potential revision statement is connected to the International Coaching Federation (ICF) Coaching Competencies demonstrated in the coach/client exchange.

Praise for Witnessing Grief

“In a culture that so often hides from grief, this step-by-step guide to understanding and integrating loss is a refreshing change. It contains insights for all.”
—Richard M. Ryan, Professor | Institute for Positive Psychology and Education, Australian Catholic University, North Sydney, and Distinguished Professor | College of Education, Ewha Women's University, South Korea

“In this daring and pertinent book, Margl speaks with courage, grace, and compassion about grief, loss, and trauma. This book is a must-read for all mental health workers today, coaches, counselors, and therapists alike… beautifully poignant writing about living and working with grief.”
—Geriann Fedorowicz, MSW, LICSW, Grief Therapist

"A gift to coaches indeed...Margl applies the Enneagram personality model in helping coaches own and understand our particular biases and how they can affect our work with clients."
—Margaret Moore, MBA, aka Coach Meg, Founder/CEO, Wellcoaches Corporation, Founder/Chair, Institute of Coaching

“A brave, inspiring, and generous work… Enneagram enthusiasts will appreciate Margl’s skill as she incorporates journal entries, captivating client examples, and thoughtful exercises to illustrate coaching strategies with an Enneagram perspective.”
—G. Ibele, MD

“A significant resource… Margl asks us to consider how we respond to another person’s grief and how we can provide support without diminishing their experience with positivity, intellectualizing, or substituting a belief system for empathy and listening. Combining this approach with the Enneagram system and the nine personality types makes this even more effective.”
—Peter O’Hanrahan, Faculty Member, the Narrative Enneagram School

“In Witnessing Grief, Margl aptly provides practical guidance with profound transparency and vulnerability, creating sacred space for safety, intimacy, and healing.”
—Fran Fisher, MCC, Author of Calling Forth Greatness

"Although written as a resource for coaches, Witnessing Grief is applicable for anyone who deals with other human beings...Margl's courage and vulnerability in sharing her own raw experience with trauma and grief adds value and uniqueness for the reader."
—Mary B. Rippon, MD FACS, Clinical Assistant Professor, University of South Carolina, School of Medicine Greenville

“For anyone who works directly with other humans, especially at their most vulnerable, this is essential reading. The invitation is here to hold space, reveal shared humanity with others, and be an actual starting point for dialogue—what a gift.”
—Heidi Huelster, Health Educator in the Saint Paul Public Schools Health Start Clinics, Restorative Practitioner

“Margl guides and teaches you how to witness grief—skillfully written to touch your heart so that you can hold the hearts of your clients.”
—Dr. Henry Toi, Dean of Research and Development, Global Eduhub, Author of Think to Thrive

Witnessing Grief: Inviting Trauma and Loss to Our Coaching Conversations, An Enneagram Perspective
Holly Margl, MCC, IEA Accredited Professional, NBCHWC, CSCS
Published August 30, 2022, by The Compassionate Mind Collaborative ISBN: 978-1737200673; $19.99