Recently, two clients independently reflected on the fluidity of time after losing a loved one.

In response to the fantasy that time heals all wounds after a child dies, Mary asks, "What the hell is time when you're grieving?"

Tracy recognizes the impermanence of time; when it's gone, it's gone.

When a loved one dies, we lose more than their physical absence; it's all the hopes and dreams for a future built on time. So, we begin to appreciate that time is not linear or guaranteed.

Humans cling to the idea that tomorrow, next month, and next year are successive and absolute. Yet, releasing the belief that we have control of time frees us to value what is and what was without fear.

Holly Margl is the award-winning author of Witnessing Grief; Inviting Trauma and Loss to Our Coaching Conversations, An Enneagram Perspective, coach, coach mentor, and trainer specializing in grief, trauma, and the Enneagram.